I've Got Some Things

While I was taking a break from my work, I launched Half-Life 2 from my Steam library. Half-Life 2 is a First-Person Shooter/Adventure game that takes place in a dystopian future where the fate of humanity appears to be grim. You play the role of Gordon Freeman, who is mysteriously released from a sort of Time Stasis from a man in a pale blue suit, using a syncopated annunciation to his words.

"Wake up and... Smell the ashes."

The game itself is a continuation of the previously transpired plot of Half-Life 1 (1998), which was the high-standard setting milestone for computer gaming, and what was to become mainstream console gaming. Every now and then, I get a taste for the original Half-Life series instead of the usual Counter-Strike: Source or Garry's Mod, so I play through either game to my liking. I chose Half-Life 2 because of the rich and extremely deep story that can branch out to anything. I often use the basis of the setting in the game as well as the atmosphere for much of my fictional pieces.

After launching the game, I was prompted with one saved point in the game. Mind you, the game had been sitting on my computer without being touched for nearly two years. I loaded the game, and it sent me to the phase where the player is sent to Ravenholm, an abandoned factory-city set in what appears to be Ukraine, as well as the rest of the game. It is on the outskirts of the Mega Cities where humans are situated by an oppressing alien force known universally as the Combine. The outskirts of these cities are deadly wastelands, laden with radioactive material, lunatics, Combine patrols and Xenian creatures (Another alien force that was unwillingly brought to Earth during the events of Half-Life 1).

Ravenholm is overrun by Zombie-like humans who have been subjected as hosts to a crab-like parasite that latches on to your head and controls your body, usually causing the subject to attack biological lifeforms. When I entered my saved game, I was positioned on top of one of the scenic points in the phase, where a dark and chilling atmosphere could be felt instantly.

The realization that places like these all over the world have become silent death traps to any survivors and refugees is all too real for a video game like that. Almost instantaneously, a thought, an idea, rushed through my head. Conflicts and settings crossed my minds and a artificial atmosphere became clear in my mind.

This is how I prefer to find inspiration, through art I can interact with.

Long Time No See

It's been a long time since I've last made the decision to waste hours of my time writing words down for a near empty blog no one will ever read wholeheartedly. I've gone through a stump of depression since I've last made a post, and my outlook on life has suffered greatly. The world, to me, is horrible- I can admit that openly but I want to believe there is still legitimate goodness in the world, but I have yet to discover it.

I don't consider myself restricted by society, and I certainly appreciate the things that I have as I don't want to come off as a smug, conceited intellectual, but I feel as though I've been cheated by the people who have been supposed to guide me in learning. When I say learning, I speak in the sense of learning that applies to general "parenting", though not literally.

Banksy-esque art that is evercliche

I've delved deep into the human mind and have begun studying many aspects of psychology, that is one milestone I can admit to that I'm actually proud of. Pride is very minimal in my case, as I've not done anything to have a sense of it. Life, to me, must be earned. Needles to say, I haven't earned it thus far and I feel like I haven't even started on the right path to earning respect, pride, and life.

If you ever care to come back, I promise that you won't be disappointed. The written word is the only tool I have to express myself.

Life is a game of winners